Archive | 12:00 am

Pardon My French

24 Feb

The finest culture
 Comes from Frontz
And hoe-knee-swat-key
 Molly-ponce!

Sally learned
 To speak in French
She’s now a dame
 And not a wench

Dick acquired
 That language fair
And now he’s swayve
 And deb-an-err

Speaking French
 Will prove you’re better
Show you’ve got a
 Rays-on-debtor

Read in French
  And sack-ray-blue!
You’re sure to find
 Your tom-pair-doo

Write in French
 And you’ll be famous
Just like muss-your
 Albert Camus

You can bet
 Your dairy-air
Your French will prove
 Your salve-war-fare

He who is
 A true believer
Shows his Gallic
 Joyed-a-fever

French cuisine
 Is all the rage
So drink Bored-O
 With soft from-age

Wear a little
 Black beret
And eat cross-ants
 With French calf-A

Then there’s all
 That art you know
So speak bow-czar
 And art-new-foe

And what a joy
 To smoke Get-tans
While watching films
 That come from Cans

I guess it’s not
 An easy job
To be a phony
 Stuck-up snob…

Such games in Frontz
 They also play
But there “c’est snob”
 To speak anglais!

Classic Quotes By Chester William Nimitz

24 Feb

Classic Quotes by Chester William Nimitz

1885-1966

American admiral

A ship is always referred to as “she” because it costs so much to keep one in paint and powder.

God grant me the courage not to give up what I think is right even though I think it is hopeless.

Uncommon valor was a common virtue.

Three favorite rules of thumb: Is the proposed operation likely to succeed? What might be the consequences of failure? Is it in the realm of practicality
in terms of materiel and supplies?fficial and celebrated diarist

As happy a man as any in the world, for the whole world seems to smile upon me!

That is not to say that we can relax our readiness to defend ourselves. Our armament must be adequate to the needs, but our faith is not primarily in these
machines of defense but in ourselves.
 

This Day In History: February 24

24 Feb

In 1803, the U.S. Supreme Court established the principle of judicial review with its Marbury v. Madison decision written by Chief Justice John Marshall.

In 1839, William Otis received a patent for his steam shovel.

In 1868, Andrew Johnson became the first U.S. president to be impeached. He was acquitted in the Senate trial.

Also in 1868, the first Mardi Gras parade in New Orleans to include floats marched.

In 1920, a group of Germans organized the National Socialist party, forerunner of the Nazi party later led by Adolf Hitler.

In 1922, Henri Landru, better known as “Bluebeard,” was executed in France for killing 10 of his girlfriends.

In 1945, U.S. troops liberated the Philippine city of Manila from the Japanese.

In 1946, Juan Peron was elected president of Argentina.

In 1970, National Public Radio was founded.

In 1986, the U.S. Supreme Court ruled unconstitutional an Indianapolis law that defined pornography as discrimination against women.

In 1988, the U.S. Supreme Court defended the right to satirize public figures when it voted 8-0 to overturn a $200,000 settlement awarded the Rev. Jerry
Falwell over the parody of him in Hustler Magazine.

In 1989, nine people were killed when a 10-by-40-foot section of a United Airlines 747 ripped away from the jetliner’s outer skin while en route from Hawaii
to New Zealand.

In 1991, U.S.-led forces began a lightning, multipronged ground assault against Iraq.

In 1992, General Motors announced a record $4.5 billion loss in 1991 and said it will close 21 plants and idle 74,000 workers over four years.

Also in 1992, the U.S. Postal Service unveiled two designs for a commemorative stamp honoring Elvis Presley — one showing him as a young rock-and-roll
singer, the other at the height of his success in Las Vegas.

In 1993, rock veteran Eric Clapton took home seven Grammy Awards for his emotion-packed “Tears In Heaven” and bluesy “Layla.”

In 1995, diver Greg Louganis, who won four gold medals in the Olympic Games in 1984 and 1988, revealed he had AIDS.

In 1996, Cuba shot down two unarmed planes flown by pilots belonging to a Cuban exile group who were looking for boat people to rescue.

In 1997, a nationally televised funeral for China’s “paramount leader” Deng Xiaoping was held at a military hospital in Beijing.

In 2002, the Winter Olympics concluded at Salt Lake City with the United States winning 34 medals, 10 of them gold, its most medals in Winter Games history
and one fewer than medals champ Germany.

In 2003, at least 260 people were killed in an earthquake in northwest China as the tremor flattened thousands of houses and other buildings. The quake
measured 6.8 on the Richter scale.

Also in 2003, Britain and Spain submitted a resolution to the U.N. Security Council declaring that Iraq’s Saddam Hussein has missed a “final opportunity”
to disarm peacefully.

In 2004, U.S. President George W. Bush called for a constitutional amendment banning same-sex marriages in the United States.

Also in 2004, an earthquake struck Morocco, killing about 600 people and injuring hundreds more.

In 2005, Pope John II underwent a tracheotomy at a Rome hospital to ease the 84-year-old pontiff’s breathing problems.

In 2006, Philippine President Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo declared a state of emergency and ordered the arrest of military officers suspected of plotting a
coup.

In 2007, a bombing near a Sunni mosque outside Baghdad killed at least 35 people, signaling an end to a downturn in sectarian violence.

In 2008, at least 52 Shiite pilgrims headed to the shrine of Imam Hussein in Karbala to celebrate Arbaeen were killed in an attack at a rest stop. Four
others were killed the next day by suicide bombers.

Also in 2008, consumer advocate Ralph Nader announced he would run for president again as an independent.

In 2009, in his first address as chief executive to a joint session of Congress, U.S. President Barack Obama spoke of the necessity of immediate action
to resurrect the flailing economy and of plans for investing in energy, healthcare and education.

Also in 2009, Taliban insurgents in Pakistan’s militarily strategic Swat Valley agreed to a cease-fire leaving them in charge of the area near the Afghan
border and about 100 miles from the Pakistani capital of Islamabad.

Notable Birthdays For February 24

24 Feb

Those born on this day include:
- Wilhelm Grimm, historian and, with his brother Jacob, compiler of Grimm’s Fairy Tales, in 1786
- Painter Winslow Homer in 1836
- John Philip Holland, inventor of the modern submarine, in 1841
- Irish author George Moore in 1852
- Baseball shortstop and Hall of Famer Honus Wagner in 1874
- Adm. Chester Nimitz, World War II commander of U.S. forces in the Pacific, in 1885
- Actress Marjorie Main in 1890
- Actor Abe Vigoda in 1921 (age 89)
- Actor James Farentino in 1938 (age 72)
- Actor Barry Bostwick in 1945 (age 65)
- Actor Edward James Olmos in 1947 (age 63)
- Actress Helen Shaver in 1951 (age 59)
- U.S. Sen. Joe Lieberman, Ind-Conn., in 1942 (age 68)
- Guitarist George Thorogood in 1950 (age 60)
- Steven Jobs, founder of the Apple computer company in 1955 (age 55)
- Race car driver Alain Prost in 1955 (age 55)
- TV personality Paula Zahn in 1956 (age 54)
- Actor Billy Zane in 1966 (age 44)
- The Kienast quintuplets of Liberty Corner, N.J., in 1970 (age 40)
- Boxer Floyd Mayweather Jr, in 1977 (age 33)
- Tennis player Lleyton Hewitt in 1981 (age 29)

Ezzy’s Joke of the Day: The Economy Is So Bad

24 Feb

The economy is so bad:

… That I got a pre-declined credit card in the mail.

… I ordered a burger at McDonalds and the kid behind
the counter asked, “Can you afford fries with that?”

… That CEO’s are now playing miniature golf.

… If the bank returns your check marked “Insufficient
Funds,” you call them and ask if they meant you or them.

… Hot Wheels and Matchbox stocks are trading higher
than GM.

… McDonalds is selling the 1/4 ouncer.

… Parents in Beverly Hills fired their nannies and
learned their children’s names.

… A truckload of Americans was caught sneaking into
Mexico .

.. Dick Cheney took his stockbroker hunting.

… Motel Six won’t leave the light on anymore.

… The Mafia is laying off judges.

… Exxon-Mobil laid off 25 Congressmen.

And finally…

Congress says they are looking into this Bernard Madoff scandal. Oh Great!!
The guy who made $50 Billion disappear is being investigated by the people
who made $1.5 Trillion disappear!

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