Archive | November, 2009

Happy Thanksgiving

26 Nov

Happy Thanksgiving

Today is a day where we hopefully focus on being thankful and appreciating the things in our lives – both big and little – all of which makes our lives
worth living. But what about tomorrow? If you really want to learn the lesson of Thanksgiving then it is essential — actually it is critical — to adopt
a Thankful attitude in your life.

When you focus on your God given gifts and appreciate what you have been given, you are leading a Thankful life. When you get up in the morning and jump
out of bed and are thankful you are alive, that is leading a Thankful life. When you sincerely are grateful for your health, for your family, your friends,
your job and sustenance, you are leading a Thankful existence.

Dont worry, it is OK to want more than you have especially if your value system is healthy and you want more so you can do more to help others. But dont
forget to be Thankful when things are going well for you and even when they are challenging. Perspective brings happiness in your life, and the right perspective
brings meaning into your life. So tomorrow morning after waking up, dont complain you have eaten too much — thank God you had a great meal and then go
to the gym.

Turkey Time

26 Nov

Turkey Time

A game warden was driving down the road when he came upon a young boy carrying a wild turkey under his arm. He stopped and asked the boy,

“Where did you get that turkey?”

The boy replied, “What turkey?”

The game warden said, “That turkey you’re carrying under your arm.”

The boy look down and said, “Well, lookee here, a turkey done roosted under my arm!”

The game warden said, “Now look, you know turkey season is closed, so whatever you do to that turkey, I’m going to do to you. If you break his leg, I’m
gonna break your leg. If you break his wing, I’ll break your arm. Whatever you do to him, I’ll do to you. So, what are you gonna do with him?

The little boy said, “I guess I’ll kiss his ass and let him go.”

Ezzy’s Joke of the Day: Watch What You Order

26 Nov

Watch What You Order

A little old man shuffled slowly into an ice cream parlor, crawled painfully
onto a stool, and ordered a banana split.

The waitress asked, “Crushed nuts?”

“No,” he replied, “it’s just arthritis.”
 

Inspirational Quotes For Thanksgiving Holiday

25 Nov

Quotes For Thanksgiving Holiday

Simran Khurana

Whhile the Thanksgiving holiday is an occasion of celebration and feasting, one must not forget the reason underlying the celebration. Here are some inspirational
quotes for thanksgiving. These simple words teach the lesson of gratitude.

Henry Ward Beecher
Gratitude is the fairest blossom which springs from the soul.

Henry Jacobsen
Praise God even when you don’t understand what He is doing.

Thomas Fuller
Gratitude is the least of the virtues, but ingratitude is the worst of vices.

Irving Berlin
Got no check books, got no banks. Still I’d like to express my thanks — I got the sun in the morning and the moon at night.

Odell Shepard
For what I give, not what I take,
For battle, not for victory,
My prayer of thanks I make.

G. A. Johnston Ross
If I have enjoyed the hospitality of the Host of this universe, Who daily spreads a table in my sight, surely I cannot do less than acknowledge my dependence.

Anne Frank
I do not think of all the misery, but of the glory that remains. Go outside into the fields, nature and the sun, go out and seek happiness in yourself
and in God. Think of the beauty that again and again discharges itself within and without you and be happy.

Theodore Roosevelt
Let us remember that, as much has been given us, much will be expected from us, and that true homage comes from the heart as well as from the lips, and
shows itself in deeds.

William Shakespeare
Small cheer and great welcome makes a merry feast.

Alice W. Brotherton
Heap high the board with plenteous cheer and gather to the feast, And toast the sturdy Pilgrim band whose courage never ceased.

H. W. Westermayer
The pilgrims made seven times more graves than huts… nevertheless, set aside a day of thanksgiving.

William Jennings Bryan
On Thanksgiving Day we acknowledge our dependence.

Hebrews 13:15
By him therefore let us offer the sacrifice of praise to God continually, that is, the fruit of our lips giving thanks to his name.

Edward Sandford Martin
Thanksgiving Day comes, by statute, once a year; to the honest man it comes as frequently as the heart of gratitude will allow.

Ralph Waldo Emerson
For each new morning with its light,
For rest and shelter of the night,
For health and food, for love and friends,
For everything Thy goodness sends.

O. Henry
There is one day that is ours. There is one day when all we Americans who are not self-made go back to the old home to eat saleratus biscuits and marvel
how much nearer to the porch the old pump looks than it used to. Thanksgiving Day is the one day that is purely American.

Cynthia Ozick
We often take for granted the very things that most deserve our gratitude.

Robert Casper Lintner
Thanksgiving is nothing if not a glad and reverent lifting of the heart to God in honor and praise for His goodness.

George Washington
It is the duty of all Nations to acknowledge the providence of Almighty God, to obey his will, to be grateful for his benefits, and humbly to implore his
protection and favor.

Robert Quillen
If you count all your assets, you always show a profit.

Cicero
A thankful heart is not only the greatest virtue, but the parent of all the other virtues.

Ezzy’s Joke of the Day

25 Nov

At a dinner party, several of the guests were arguing
whether men or women were more trustworthy. “No woman,”
said one man, scornfully, “can keep a secret.”

“I don’t know about that,” huffily answered a woman guest.
“I have kept my age a secret since I was twenty-one.”

“You’ll let it out some day,” the man insisted.

“I hardly think so!” responded the lady. “When a woman has
kept a secret for twenty-seven years, she can keep it
forever.”

Quotes That Make You Think

24 Nov

Quotes That Make You Think

Life is uncertain so eat your dessert first.

No matter how misbehaved a child, the parents will accept.

A willing helper comes without asking.

War does not determine who is right, only who is remaining.

Happiness is a place between too little and too much.

From small beginnings could come great things.

Harmony creates accommodation.

Hope for miracles, but don’t rely on one happening.

God did not create hurry.

If a man knew where he would fall, he would spread straw there first.

The water is the same on both sides of the boat.

Even a small star shines in the darkness.

Love blinds your eyes, marriage opens them wide.

Closeness without conflict only exists in the cemetery.

An empty barn doesn’t need a roof.

Ezzy’s Joke of the Day: Old Lady And the Dollar

24 Nov

Old Lady And the Dollar

A little girl asked her mother for a dollar to give to an old lady in the park. Her mother was touched by the child’s kindness and gave her the required
sum.

    “There you are, my dear,” said the mother.  “But, tell me, isn’t the lady able to work any more?”

    “Oh yes,” came the reply.  “She sells candy.” 

Love Story

23 Nov

Love Story

I will seek and find you.
I shall take you to bed and have my way with you.

I will make you ache, shake & sweat until you moan & groan.

I will make you beg for mercy, beg for me to stop.

I will exhaust you to the point that you will be relieved when I’m finished
with you.

And, when I am finished, you will be weak for days.

All my love,

The Flu

You know where my mind went.
 

Ezzy’s Joke of the Day: Job Interview

23 Nov

Job Interview

An office manager was given the task of hiring an individual to fill a job opening. After sorting through a stack of resumes he found four people who were
equally qualified. He decided to call the four in and ask them one question and their answer would determine who would get the job.

The day came and as the four sat around the conference room table the interviewer asked “What is the fastest thing you know of?” pointing to the man on
his right.

The first man replied “A thought. It pops into your head. There’s no forewarning that it’s on the way, it’s just there. A thought is the fastest thing
I know of.”

“That’s very good!” replied the interviewer. And now you sir?

He asked the second man. “Hmm…. let me see, A blink! It comes and goes and you don’t know ever happened. A blink is the fastest thing I know of.”

“Excellent!” said the interviewer “The blink of an eye. That’s a very popular cliché for speed.” as he turned to the third man who was contemplating his
reply.

“Well, out at my dad’s ranch, you step out of the house and on the wall there’s a light switch, when you flip that switch, way out across the pasture the
light at the barn comes on in an instant.” Turning on a light is the fastest thing I can think of.”

The interviewer was very impressed with the third answer and thought he had found his man. “It’s hard to beat the speed of light.” he said. Turning to
the fourth man, he posed the question.

“After hearing the three previous answers, it’s obvious to me that the fastest thing known is diarrhea.”

“WHAT!?” said the interviewer, stunned by the response.

“Oh I can explain.” said the fourth man. “You see the other day wasn’t feeling so good and I ran for the bathroom. But, before I could think, blink, or
turn on the light, I’d crapped in my pants!”

He got the job.

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